Friday, April 24, 2009

The Thong Debate~ Help Me Out!

Ok, I go back and forth on this one. I agree with one point of view and then the other.
One of my kids (who shall remain nameless Ü) has a fascination with thongs.
And I have told this person they can't wear them. And Yet I find a stray one here or there in the laundry. And yesterday I pulled six of them out of their load of laundry. And confiscated them. And this person is furious that I won't let them wear them. their point of view is that they are comfortable, and it gives them no panty lines. And their other panties hang out of their pants and people can see. And who cares if they wear them if no one eles sees them.
This has turned into a HUGE fight. Doors slammed. Saying they hate their life and hate their family. All over the thong!
And yet I keep hearing the thong song in my head......girl I know you wanna show that thooong.....let me see that thooongg...
See that's what guys think of when they see a thong. And they are so trashy when you see them hang out of jeans. And little girls do it all the time . sick.
And what about modesty? Does it matter if it is under your clothes and no one sees them?
And how about the sneakiness? I said no and yet they keep buying them.
Sooo....help me out here. You know~choose your battles. is this a battle to fight? Does it matter what is under the clothes? Do you think it is a problem that they even want to wear them in the first place? Oh and one of them freaks me out. Looks like a thong in the FRONT and the back. Umm ouch....yeast infection here it comes! Hmmm maybe a choice and consequence moment!

15 comments:

RhondaLue said...

As for me and my house will we have no thongs. NONE. PERIOD. Speaking of period...seriously-don't they need a full panty to hold a pad in place? maybe she doesn't use pads. It's none of my business but we've had the suggestion here and it ain't happenin'.

I can tell you that what girls wear UNDER can still show through on the outside. And I'm not talking panty lines. If they feel all trashy or sexy or whatever you think wearing a thong makes one feel....they may also *act* that way eventually too.

I try to buy Desi big ol' granny panties but we settle on boy shorts (no panty lines) and they're still low enough so as not to feel GRANNISH.

I really understand there are so many teen battles to conquer so it's up to you if this is one you want to fight or not but my final thought is this: It's hard enough to go from reg undies to G's once ya go through the temple...can you imagine being accustomed to thongs and the hard adjustment THAT would be?

Amanda said...

I remember asking my mom if i could wear them when i was teenager and she said that she will NEVER EVER buy me thongs, so if i wanted to wear them i had to pay for them myself. I don't care for them now, i LOVE the boyshorts or the hipsters. no panty lines and way more cute.

Crazymamaof6 said...

HUH, hard one.
i'm more about honesty , and avoid sneakiness.
so really if someday my girls decide they want to wear them, i'll probably buy them, because it feels way less exciting when your mom knows you have them, and are wearing them. and if you buy them, she'll get more conservative ones that the floss kind.

i totally believe it takes the thrill out of it if mom is on board. with anything, hair styles, outfits, and panties.

and girls can feel just as sexy wearing full cut bikinis . depending on the fabric.

i once heard of a girl that wore boy briefs on dates, ACTUAL BOYS UNDERROOS because then she'd be embarassed to have anyone SEE her underwear.

i thought it was genius. since i was wearing V.S. lacy #'s and dying to show Anyone that wanted to see.

if she really doesn't want pantylines, offer her spanx. or long line panties. FABULOUS for not having lines and really close to wearing g's for later.

what i'm saying is...it doesn't really matter what kind of underwear she's wearing, if she's gonna show them, she will. and if she doesn't feel all sneaky about it it will take alot of the thrill out of it.
but that's me.

Shelli said...

Hey, I thought I was going to help you decide if YOU wanted to wear a thong. Maybe that would work -- tell her that if she's going to wear a thong, so are you, and you'll make sure all her friends just happen to see it when you bend over to pick something off the floor.

I haven't had too much debate about thongs yet. I've found one or two and just thrown them away without any conversation. I think Kyara is too tight with money to want to keep buying them.

I also hate the crack, though! There's plenty of that when my kids bend over. I hate the style of jeans they wear these days.

Bottom line (no pun intended lol), is that it's a tough call. I know you're supposed to pick your battles, but no one ever tells you which ones to pick!

The Northwest Bunch said...

(Jim's speaking first) If you want, I'll talk to Zach. I'm sure the other guys on the team put him up to this, if not then we have some real problems. They're not very flattering on guys... I mean who likes those hairy legs and pimpley cheeks hanging out.

(Now, Janeal has something to say)

I believe that sneaking around to wear them is WRONG!!!

I do not have this problem. I have the problem of wearing tank tops to school without me knowing and covering it up with a jacket. This I find to be sneaky and not following modest dress standards.

If she really wants to wear a thong that badly then she needs to purchase them for herself.
I personally do not think that there is anything wrong with them if they are intended for only her eyes. If the are for other reasons and are used to make bad choices then you have an issue.

Where do you draw the line is up to you. But then you have to remember that there are pretty sleazy bras out there too.
Good luck with this and remember what ever decision you make, to stand firm and not back down.

KLS said...

I thought thongs were the best thing in the world when they came out, because of the no panty lines. It wasn't about feeling sexy for me. I just really didn't want the panty line. I never thought they were all that comfortable. Now that boy shorts came out, I agree with Amanda. That is all I wear. They are cute, modest, and comfortable. Way better than the thong!!!!! I don't have kids, but I would have to say that age of a child wearing them would matter to me as a parent, going behind your back not a good thing either. I do have to say that as long as they know how you feel, then that will be in the back of their mind every time they wear one and maybe that is enough. The excitement of a thong will wear off.

Amber said...

Ugh. I sooooooo dread these challenges in my future. As much work as they are when they are little, I'd rather have those challenges than teen-aged ones!

Cara said...

I love all the comments. I say no to thongs because she's wearing them to show whether she knows it yet or not. What you where makes you feel different things. Sexy underwear - sexy feelings. No to the thongs, tank tops, and short shorts - thats what goes on at this house. Offer to buy her the cute bra and panties that match. Target has cute ones right now that are multi bright colors - fun yet not sexy. You are doing the right thing. Parenting stinks sometimes!

Lynda said...

I love this. You can be conservative and still wear thongs. Nicole did, and I never saw them unless I was there on wash day. But what the heck, didn't we all go around pulling our pants out of our butts from wedgies. I don't see a lot of difference between a wedgie and a thong. Just my opinion, but...
And if the real bottom line is no panty lines, the boy shorts are cute and accomplish the same purpose.
If the real purpose is to make her parents crazy, the go ahead and buy them for her. But remind her that if anyone else sees them they will also see more of her butt than otherwise, and depneding on her issues, that may solve the problem. ROFLOL
Have fun. Teenagers and babies make your life soooo fun!

Kricket said...

Ok, I wore a thong (sometimes) in highschool b/c I absolutely hated the panty lines. I'm 37 so that should tell you how long ago and how uncommon that was then. Anyway, I wear Gs now and it is super hard to get used to them. I wore thongs forever and love them. I like the boy shorts too.

I don't think wearing a thong is going to make somebody promiscuous. You know you're daughter. If you feel it is a panty line issue then don't worry about it. Let her wear them. If it's something else then maybe boy shorts would be better. Don't sweat it too much - its only underwear for Pete's sake. lol

RhondaLue said...

I just had to come back and read all of your comments! I love it. There really is no right or wrong answer from any of us. Just whatever YOU feel is right or wrong for your daughter but I sure love the different perspectives!

kristifritzel said...

I don't think the thongs are the problem, it's the fact that she lied about it. And I think that is what you should stress.
If she wants them, take her to go buy them. Then the idea of rebelling over it is out. And, you can get her to pick cotton ones which are less likely to cause yeastie beasties. Go find somewhere that has joe boxer, all cotton. and they are all trendy and cute. (They also happen to have tons of cute boy shorts, you might be able to point out a fabulous pair and see if she wants an extra pair)

Cheffie-Mom said...

Do what you think is best Mama! I've actually seen little girl thongs! Can you believe it??!

Ginger said...

Ha,ha,ha. Memories, memories, memories. Give up on this one, you won't win so you may as well be part of the problem. Remember Danyelle's short skirts and the bikinis? I agree with Kristi, take her shopping. Feeling a little sexy is OK.

Juli said...

If you don't agree with thongs then don't buy them for her, but let her buy her own. Obviously she already is. The lying would be a big deal for me and we would have to talk about that. She is the one that will have to deal with the yeast and bladder infections too. Especially in the Arizona heat! Yuck! Enjoy that consequence. Life is full of choices and they don't always have good results. :( Good luck! Mom's right, feeling sexy is Ok.