Tuesday, June 16, 2009

In Pursuit Of The Perception Of Perfection!

I hate being in a funk and I think I am there again.
Went to pick up Zach from football this morning and when I arrived I saw the one woman/mom that bugs the crap out of me. Boob Job Betty. The one with the perfect hair, perfect clothes, perfect car, now the perfect teeth since her braces are off, perfect boobs, and perfect house. And there was me. In my jammies (in my defense...Tony claims it looks like a house dress. Does that count?) With red eyes from crying from fighting with the crappy Dr, and wild bed hair. At least I didn't get out of the car so she could see me in all my glory. Ughh why of all the mom's did I have to run into her? She is so snotty to me. And somehow I always end up feeling like spam sucking trailer trash around her.
Unfortunately she is also Zach's best friends mom. So I had to take Zach by her house to pick up his stuff. And Zach was pointing out the new cars they just bought. Including the new truck for his friend who just turned 16. And then he told me about the maid that comes daily that they like to tease. And for some reason everything just really, really bugged the crap out of me. I was even envious of her only having two kids. Thinking I envy how easy it must be. And the money, and the cars, and the maids. And thinking I want it all too. Or at least thinking I want to have that dang perception of perfection. And yet somehow I just don't think I will ever get there. Do you ever wonder why some women seem so, so together and then there are women like me? And suddenly I just felt so dang tired.
So I finally did the smart thing and went home. And went back to bed. For FOUR hours! Sheesh!
Did it help my mood? Not really but at least I am not so dang tired.
My teens were awsome watching the littles for me today so I could sleep and stay in bed today. They really are fantastic on the days that I am puking all day. I guess if I can't have it all at least I still have a great family. And know someday it will get easier.

Now help me here~I have been worried over the name thing...Tony and I just haven't been able to come up with a name we agreed on. And then I was watching Discovery health Birth stories and heard a name I loved. It was this little Mexican couple that named their baby this. But I don't think it sounded Hispanic. Tony thought it was too weird. But I love it. So I have continued to bug the snot out of him. And my cousin came over and I was telling her how I was worried cause I loved the name but Tony thought it was weird. So then Tony says hey, if you love it, go ahead and name her it. So I tell Sherri the name and guess what?? She tells me that is my Cousin Becky's daughters name! Are you kidding me?
I've never even heard of another person with this name! I can't believe it!
I have nothing. Nadda. No names I love. Just this one.
So my question is is it rude to name your kid a name that other family members names theirs?
I never see Becky, never talk to her, didn't even know her daughter was named that.
Hey Rebecca~ Were you watching Birth Stories too? Dang~
I want to name our little girl Addlynn. Or spell it addeline. Or Addelynne. Not sure on the spelling yet. Plus need a middle name and don't have anything either.Maybe after 6 you run out of ideas?
Whatcha think of the name? Does it matter if my cousin named hers the same if we never see each other?
Any other name suggestions?
We are getting to the end here and nothing fits. Just this one name!


Ginger said...

Go with the name, George Foreman named ALL of his sons Gerorge. It really doesn't matter. I wanted Jimmy and Mike to both name their sons James, so it works for me.

Forget about the perfection you see in others, they also have problems and pains you are not seeing. Remember my friend who seemed so perfect, never a hair out of place, etc. and announced one day she was getting a divorce? Her "secret" life was a nightmare. You will have it all, just not at the same time. Enjoy being a Mommy now, the rest comes later.

Amanda said...

I almost named zoey that, i was smushing names together though, i didn't know it was hispanic, i just knew that Lynn was going to be in her name somewhere.

as for the perfection... well grandmas right, listen to your mother. :)

the right name will come to you.

Lynda said...

Ya know, it's your baby. You have spent 9 months puking and feeling like crap in order to get her here. Name her what you want. Everyone will get used to it. If you have a cousin you don't see, who cares if they have the same names. It's not your sibling, so they'll never be together anyway.

As to the other woman, your mom is right as usual. Those "perfect" women have way more problems than we could ever know. I mean, c'mon... how would you feel having to be perfect all the time? And from personal experience, many of them are in abusive relationships so MUST be perfect all the time.

Be yourself. You have tons of friends and people who love you. Even though sometimes it makes you envious to see people with stuff, your "stuff"... those people in your home that drive you crazy, will make the rest of your life worth living!

Just think about your parents and how happy and fulfilled they are when they are surrounded by their offspring, their offspring's offspring, and the offspring's offspring's offspring.

It'll be fine. The baby will get born and things will get back to normal. You'll be nursing so get to eat a lot and still lose weight.

And after all, it's only the perception of perfection!
Life is good!

kristifritzel said...

I work with someone who named her kid Addelynne. They call her Addi.

As for the perfection. She chose 2 kids and money to acheive her perfection. You chose a buttload and happiness. How can you not have famiy get togethers and not call that perfection?

Shelli said...

Janeal named her baby Reagan, and then Stephanie named hers Reagan, too. They were born around the same time, and according to Steph, the ladies in the nursery thought it was too cute to have "the Reagans" in nursery together. Heck, I would be honored if you chose to name her Kyara, Johnette, or Anneli! Of course, Lynda is right, you carried that child, you get to name her!

There was a woman in church years ago that bugged the crap out of me. She and her husband seemed soooo self-righteous! It really grated on my nerves. So, one day, I purposely sought her out and gave her a compliment -- I told her she had such beautiful kids. She just kind of melted, and we became surprisingly good friends after that! I discovered she was actually kind of crazy, and I liked it.

Who knows, maybe if you would realize that you are just about the most fun friend to have in the world, you would be able to reach out to her a little. Someone living in a glass house like that could probably use a friend.

Crazymamaof6 said...

name her whatever you want , if that's the name you love. and it's DARLING! do it. dude you had to puke for how long? ULMIMATE POWER! that's how i roll.

about the perfect lady? her husband probably cheats. they are in debt up to their eyeballs. the list of crap that could be her reality is long. just hope her life is secretly shiz, and you'll feel way better. maybe she envy's your herd of kids, and your husband? it could happen.

a maid that comes daily? what a BITCH! i'd be hating her too.

Kricket said...

Boob job Betty is probably one of the 50% of women who has never had an orgasm - think of that next time you see her and SMILE!

RhondaLue said...

I agree with everyone else about the baby name. It's adorable and I know a couple people that named their kidlet Addelynn. So cute! Even if the kids saw eachother all the time, If you like the name you should name her that!

As for Boob Job Betty...I find that at times when I'm up to stress PAST my eyeballs is when I might start to feel envious. I had, many years ago, just despised a certain lady at church. She looked too perfect and I assumed she was a snot. After being in the ward with her for a few years she became a very close and dear friend. In fact, I can't BELIEVE I was ever so judgemental in my head about her because she was so wonderful. When she moved I was very, very sad. Also, as I got to know her I got to know some of her struggles and it totally humanized her to me. We're all humans, bigboob Betty, TRUST ME, has her own issues, even while looking great. In fact, some of the most "together" looking women struggle with stuff I'd never want on my plate. You have a beautiful family, even though it's not easy. I had a gorgeous friend once that had it ALL but struggled with infertility. I was admiring a certain aspect of her life and she got very serious and said that she'd trade every last thing to be able to have a child and be a mother. I felt SO awful about the things I was complaining about that SHE had because in reality-I have it all.

The Northwest Bunch said...

I love the name and the spelling.
It was fun having someone else name there child the same it shows what great taste in names you have. Also Sherry's sis named her daughter Delaynie. So why not.

I know that this has been said a million different ways but you can not always judge a book by its cover. It may looks amazing on the outside. The cover is flashy. All the pages in perfect condition. No stains nor tears. Everything looks perfect for the perfect story but the material that is written is just garbage. There is no substance.
Then you find that one book that has been read over and over again(a classic) the book not new but worn, pages maybe missing or just a little dirty,a book that may seem out of place in the sea of all the new books but the story is so beautiful. Nothing can compare to its beauty. It stands alone for it is perfection in every way.

The love that you have for your family and CHRIST out weighs any boob job,teeth whitening,perfect clothes or whatever else that she has that you think you need or want. We were all created in His image so remember YOU ARE A DAUGHTER OF OUR HEAVENLY FATHER that is here to raise A FAMILY that strives to be LIKE CHRIST and by doing this we sometimes put our selves on hold. This may be silly but when I feel down I recite the YW theme. I puts our life into perspective.

You will have your GLORY,LAURI.

I really struggled with this when I lived in the desert. Those women were everywhere. I tried to look my best all the time and never felt that I ever was there. I was at the gym 5 days a week for 1 1/2 hours. Lost a lot of weight and could wear fabulous clothes but it never was enough. I had to keep finding other things I was not good at.

I put myself first in a selfish way and my marriage suffered and so did my kids. I still strive to work out but it is not my top priority before my family, if it happens it happens. I now realize that my greatest joy is to know that I did all that I could to help raise my family in the gospel. We all have something someone else wants we just don't know it!!

You are fabulous in every way,house dress and all.

Juli said...

Isn't it interesting how each one of us has gone through this same thing?! My favorite scripture is Eccl. 3,1 Everything has a time and season. It helped me realize I don't have to do it all now.

I would love to be you. Your life looks pretty great to me. Actually it's perfect.

Love the name.

Amber said...

I am so so so sorry about the funk. Being big, pregnant, sick and miserable don't help, either. This, too shall pass!

As for names, I wouldn't think twice about giving my child the same name as someone in my family.

Cheffie-Mom said...

I'm sorry you are in a funk!! I'm sending hugs your way!! And I love the name Addlynn!

Summin' it up! said...

How about Atalie? It's close to Addlynn? 8D

Sarah said...

Don't worry, the woman that bugs the crap out of you is probably clinically depressed and they are in a heap of debt. :)

Jenifer said...

Both my girls have the same names as my cousins girls. I liked the names, so I used them. As for that lady...they always make me feel insecure too. Like Sarah said, I bet they have a ton of debt. And her husband hates her. That's why she tries so hard.