I'm feeling totally bummed and frustrated tonight. So I think I am gonna vent a minute here even at the risk of sounding like a pathetic loser!
See ever since living here in Arizona I have had the hardest freakin time making friends! It's unlike anything I've ever experienced! I mean yeah...I am socially retarded at first and I would totally rather go to a proctologist than put myself out there and try to make new friends but I HAVE been trying!
And it feels like I come off as a stalker or something. There is only so many times I can ask someone to do something before I get it~ they don't want to hang out! Ok!
I even thought that I'd try to get into a bunko group. So I could make friends. But you know what? They have a approved list of who can and cannot sub! No, not be a regular, but sub! I guess I am not cool enough! What the freak? I've always played in groups. In Cali I played in two. And I was in them in Utah and Clolorado! Whatever.
But I miss having girlfriends! In Utah we'd have get aways where a group of us would ditch our kids and hubbys and we'd go away. Park City, or to the mountains in a cabin. Just a girls weekend. And my family would camp with their families. And I'd find my cheeks cramping from laughing so much when we'd hang out.
And yet I can't seem to make one single friend here. And it bothers me but I've tried not to think about it. But last night we sat with another couple at the comedy club. Both shows were sold out so we came early for the dinner. The couple that sat with us were so fun. And Jenna the woman there asked how many kids we had. I told her 11 total and she laughed and said she had 10! Then Tony was telling her we just got a bassett hound puppy. And they told us they have two! And she is my age. And we both laughed over the diet she was doing that I had tried already.there were just so many things we had in common. And we laughed and I got along so good with her just in those three hours before the show. It reminded me how much I miss hanging out with girlfriends. Going to lunch,the movies, scrap booking, camping, talking. Just girl stuff. She lives in Surprise which is very far away. And I was bummed.It reminded me how lonely I feel here. Pathetic I know!
So today I am just frustrated and bummed. And want to move away now worse than ever. I feel like a outcast here. I don't fit in and I am praying that the position opens up for us to be able to move back to Utah.
And in the meantime I guess maybe it's time for me start asking myself~ Is it me??