52 Blessings Project ~ Week 32

This Week I am Grateful For~ A Clean House!

I was a little irked with how messy my house was getting and the fact that I was running the kids all around and yet they didn't want to help out by doing their jobs. Well Tony had promised that this weekend everyone would work together and bust the house out. I was a little skeptical but to my delight they did it!

Tony and Rachelle pulled all the clothes out of the laundry room and sorted them and cleaned the laundry room. Zachary cleaned out my downstairs closet. I keep my holiday stuff in it and the girls keep some toys in it but people have been putting junk in it and you couldn't even see the floor of it. It was something that drove me crazy!!

Rachelle did the bathrooms, and Hannah did the office. I worked on the kitchen, and laundry.

Today Zachary decided to finish what we started and he cleaned the toy room! It looks fantastic. I feel so much better when my house is clean. It brings me a peaceful feeling. When I am feeling overwhelmed having a messy house really, really stresses me out.

When I woke up today, I went into the kitchen and saw a clean sink with my towel on the counter to wipe the sink out whenever I used it ( a flylady thing) It is so strange how happy that made me to see it clean! It actually motivated me to keep up on it all day. I have been picking up and doing laundry. I finally feel as if I can do it again!

What a blessing my husband and kids have given me. Not only a clean house but a feeling of peace as I start my week and for that I am very grateful!

Quick Update

When I decided to post about struggling with depression I was irritated and tired and probably not in the best frame of mind. It seemed like a good thing to do at the moment.
When I woke up we had to leave early and I didn't have the time to remove the post. I was totally stressing about it. I just kept thinking ~ Great~ Now I've waived my freak flag high as can be for the entire world to see! Kind of embarrassing.
Well, by the time I was able to log on I had a ton of comments. I felt so much better and not quite so embarrassed!
So, I just wanted to say thanks for all the support. It definitely made me feel better!
Also, I had a lot of people asking me if I was on medication etc.. what was I doing, so I thought I'd take a moment and give a quick update. I did go to the Dr and he is running some test ~hormones, thyroid etc.. My hair is falling out like crazy, I am tired and dizzy, emotional, and having panic attacks. He thought maybe hormones are a major culprit. I hope so. I was put on medication to deal with the depression and he told me it would take a good 30 days to feel better. I AM feeling better. Still emotional~ A little weepy not much energy but I am not sobbing uncontrollably anymore. I feel hopeful now like I can get a grip which is a good improvement. So..I am just glad to be feeling a bit better!
This is not the first time I spoke first then was embarrassed later and I am sure it won't be the last . I think I could learn to use a little restraint! Oh well Ü

Weekend Fun~ Part 2

Here are the final pictures of our fun getaway to Payson. The last day that we were there we went out to breakfast then to the park in town. It was fabulous! Isabelle~What is it with Vidal's and the fishing obsession? Bailey has been bitten by the fishing bug and Toti couldn't be happier!

New Crockpot Recipe

Since things have been a little chaotic lately I have been crockpotting it a bit around here. I found this recipe a while ago and made it last night. Forgot how much my kids liked this recipe so I thought I'd share it with those of you who like crockpotting too!

It is made similar to chicken and rice but has a whole different flavor.

Golden Angel Crockckpot Chicken

2 cans Golden Mushroom Soup

1 Pkg chive n onion cream cheese softened

1 pkg Italian seasoning mix (the dry stuff.. good seasons)

1 c. white cooking wine (alcohol burns off during cooking )

1/2 c melted butter

3-4 carrots~ Julienned

enough chicken for you family. I usually do 8-10 pieces like thighs

Melt butter in a saucepan.Add the rest of the ingredients except for the chicken. cook until melted. Put chicken in crock pot. Add carrots Pour sauce over top. Cook on low 6-8 hours or high 4-6 hours

Serve over Angel hair pasta,rice or noodles. I like it with noodles~ Zach says definitely with the rice.

I use chive and onion cream cheese but you can use regular too.

Very good ~ super easy. If you try it let me know how you like it!

Just Some Random Crap!

Yeah..I think..School has started! It's kind of a mixed bag for me right now. Zachary and Rachelle have to take a 0 hour class. For those of you who don't live here~ When you take seminary as a class in school you have to add a extra class to your school schedule. This sucks big time because I have to take the kids to school every morning and leave by 6am! Ugh~ I am so not a morning person. I think it may kill me! So...Is seminary that important? I'm not sure since I hated it so much growing up and I slept in the bathroom most of the time during seminary.I want my kids to gain a testimony to learn about the gospel etc.. but if they are like me (and Zach says he is..ditching sometimes, sleeping the other times)is it worth the struggle?
Hannah was complaining of her head itching. I took a look and found 2 bugs!! YUCK~Lice! We think she got it at the hair salon. We got her hair cut the day before school and on the first day of school we found the bugs. There aren't any eggs yet so she must have just gotten them! SICK,SICK,SICK!!! Treated her hair twice now and they appear to be gone but I am freaked out now. I will probably be checking every one's hair for weeks to come!
So, I am tired like crazy right now. Ethan has learned to mix it up with the girls now. What the freak?? My 14 month old baby is trying to beat the crap out of his sisters. It has been melt down after meltdown today.I am afraid the next one will be me throwing it. I am exhausted by the time the older ones get home from school. Zach has football practice everyday after school so it is a race to have everyone pick up the house, go get Zach, get dinner on, feed everyone, get the kitchen cleaned, then everyone to bed! I know I did alot better last year. I just need to get in the groove again. I think I need to try Flylady again. Help me OBI ONE Flylady...help me!
If she doesn't do the trick Tony swears he will do it! Keep your fingers crossed. He seems to think we can bust out the house on Saturday. I hate having it out of control.
It has been storming here tonight. The monsoons have kicked up. Every time it rains here the news channels get their panties in a bunch I swear...Stay inside if you can...Unbelievable...NEVER drive through standing water..Dangerous...A full inch of water has fallen(gasp)..Weather alert has been issued. It's like this great natural disaster is happening. I swear Tony and I crack up when we hear it. I think since there is no other weather to report for 10 months out of the year the news casters get overly excited that they finally have something to do.
Even if it isn't life threatening I still love a good storm!
Oh, Oh~ tonight was the season finale of so you think you can dance! It was awesome. Loved that Jeremy won! Who were you rooting for? I liked all four in the finals so I would have been OK with any of them winning but I thought Jeremy was so sweet and I loved that he wasn't professionally trained yet he kicked butt! Yeah for the underdog!
So..How are you all adjusting to new schedules. Is it smooth going for you or are the first few weeks kind of hairy?
Seminary??
Do you totally sick out over lice? I swear I feel dirty.

Tomorrow is my day I can just feel it~Flylady and me...we can. Yes, we can....
I so so wish I could just be one of those super on top of it organized women. it just isn't in the Proffitt family genes I just know it!

Weekend Fun~ Part 1

I thought I'd post a few pictures of our fun weekend in the mountains!

We decided we wanted to try a new lake we hadn't been to before called Knolls Lake. It is about 21 miles past Woods Canyon that you travel to on a awful gravel road. Good thing the kids were excited because they were great on the way up. Even Ethan was so good. He thought he was funny trying to make everyone laugh!





When we got to the lake it was amazing! Absolutely beautiful. We set up some chairs and had a picnic of KFC (As you can see..Ethan loves chicken. Even hot wings.)

After lunch the girls had some fun exploring everything. Grace of course had to pick up pine cones everywhere and Hannah and Bailey were climbing on all the rocks and tree stumps.

After a bit of playing Bailey was over it! All she wanted was to go fishing! We kept telling her we weren't going yet and to just put her rod down, but she wasn't having any of that!

Finally Bailey got her wish! Fishing at last! She was funny, she was so into it. Didn't want to leave her "fishing Log"

She didn't catch one but when daddy did he let her real it in and that was the highlight of the day. When they threw the fish back he was floating, Not gonna make it,so we got him and put him in my super big gulp cup and she played with him while he died. Nice eh?

Hannah and Grace didn't have the patience for fishing so they took cups and water bottles and tried catching minnows and crawdads! They didn't have any luck capturing a minnow but we did snag this juicy little crawdad! Terrifying and Delightful all at once!

After several hours we were wiped out so we called it a day and headed back. On the way back we stopped at the mogollin rim for some pictures. (I am just as scared today as I was as a kid getting close to the edge~only this time I didn't cling to some one's leg screaming even though I wanted to!)It was beautiful and amazing.

After the rim we drove to Willow Lake just up the road to check out one more lake and the campgrounds. It was pretty amazing also. Good future camping trip. As we were leaving the campground a HUGE storm blew through. This picture doesn't even do it justice. We tried driving, but couldn't see anything in front of us so we had to pull over and wait a bit for the storm to calm down. The lightning would strike and then immediately the thunder would boom. It felt like our car was shaking. Scary and fun all at once!

Something else cool about the storm?? Look at the temperature!!! 53 degrees! I haven't seen that in a while and I was lovin it! Tried to roll down the window to feel it but was getting pelted in the face by the rain. Not too smart!

By this time the kids were exhausted and fell asleep and Tony and I had a delightful, scenic, quiet ride back to the hotel! It was wonderful.....

Ahhh and back to reality again...I guess we still are in Arizona! 100 not bad although we still were in Payson!

Good News!!

Zachary and Rachelle got home last night from their trip with their dad. They were pretty pissed about the house and car and said if it was one of their friends they were going to kill them. Hannah was a mess. She was hysterical when we got home and found the kitten gone! Before we had left she had cleaned the litter, gotten fresh food and water and made a bed for the cats. She was devastated to find the kitty gone.She loves them and thinks they love her best. She says they really are kinda just her cats cause she takes care of them best and loves them best. We were so sad for her and when the older kids saw how upset she was it made them even madder!

Zach was outside talking on the phone with his friends at about 1:30 am when he heard a little meow. He found the kitty! Apparently when whoever broke into the house they had let the cat out. We had already searched the neighborhood and couldn't find him when we got home so it is awesome that the kitty found it's way back home!

He woke Hannah up and she was thrilled. She came and woke everyone up to share the good news!

I was really upset last night so this takes a little sting out of it!

Yeah~At last good news!

52 Blessings Project ~ Week 31

This Week I Am Grateful For ~ The Mountains!

Ever since Tony and I have been married we have shared a mutual love of going to the mountains. When we lived in Utah we went weekly up the canyon to our favorite fishing hole or to the silver fork lodge for some apple crisp or just to the lake for a evening walk.

In Colorado we didn't go up to the mountains as often only about once every three weeks but we made it a point to make sure we went often enough.

I love finding wild flowers and putting them in my scriptures to dry out. When I come across them I am reminded of our adventure. I have a columbine that is dried out that whenever I open my scriptures I remember our trip in Utah that I found it where we drove for hours and hours exploring a area we had never been. We just love driving and finding new places and enjoying the beauty of the trees, rivers and lakes.

This weekend Tony took me and the kids for a much needed break up to the mountains. We stayed in Payson a small city that is in the pines just outside of the White Mountains. We went up to several lakes and fished, we gathered flowers, swam, had a picnic and just relaxed. It was wonderful!

Although my cheeks are sunburned and my lips are chapped, I feel a small measure of peace that I haven't felt for awhile now and had been longing for. And for that I am very thankful!

A Rude Homecoming!

Talk about a total bummer! We had such a wonderful day today, relaxing, cool, just really nice and we come home to finding our home Tp'd and our car and home broken into! What the freak?
Our water bottles were thrown into the street, our house tp'd in the front and side, and someone had broken into the car and taken all of Tony's work files out and threw them all over our porch!
We had not locked the dead bolt on the house just the lower lock and the deadbolt was now locked , our kitten is gone from the house, and our desk drawers were all open with our files! Sighhh..
Tony is being really sweet. Running around frantically..cleaning up the front yard and then the house. He said we had such a good weekend he didn't want me to get totally stressed out after coming home to that!
If I find out it was one of Zach or Rach's friends, so help me I will go nuts. Breaking into our home and car took it way too far. I am not sure what to think since nothing appears to have been taken other than the kitty(Maybe he got out when they opened the door?) and things were messed up.
Bummer

Question? To Blog About It~Or Not?

It is 2 am and I can't sleep again so I thought I am just going to write about this. I am sure there are others who have probably felt like this. Or not.

These past few weeks I have been walking a emotional tightrope and I have finally fallen off.


I had felt low, sad, but I thought I was OK and then finally~I crashed.


I can't seem to quit crying all the time. I have found myself telling my family I was going to the Circle K for my soda, and then find myself in the church parking lot where no one will see me curled up in a ball, praying,crying,trying to get a grip so I could return home and try to act normal. Sometimes I can't breathe! Why can't I just get up and get stuff done? Why am I in a panic and can't draw a breath?


I think my husband is embarrassed by this. Our home teacher came over and my heart was racing as I was trying to figure out how to ask for a blessing without being humiliated or sobbing uncontrollably. I almost didn't. He was standing to go and I mouthed to Tony do you think it would be OK if I asked for a blessing from him? I did, and of course, I did cry uncontrollably. Humiliating.


The other day Tony was talking to his mom and they were discussing all of the trials his family is going through now. I asked him if he told his mom I was having a hard time.(she has been very supportive in the past when I had postpartum depression) He looked at me like I was crazy (which I kinda am)and said of course not!


When I told him I love blogging but worry my mood will show through he suggested I give it a break. And definitely~Don't post about being depressed!


So~ this has me thinking here. Why is it so shameful to admit we are struggling with something? To admit not only am I not perfect, but I am far from it?



If you read other people's blogs, I am sure you have read this quote~President Gordon B. Hinkley: "You will have significant experiences. I hope that you will write them down and keep a record of them, that you will read them from time to time and refresh your memory of these meaningful, significant things. Some of them may be funny. Some may be of significance only to you. Some of them may be sacred and quietly beautiful. Some may build one upon another until they represent a lifetime of special experience."

I agree wholeheatedly with this quote and blogging for me is how I record those memories. I have never been one to keep a diary or journal but blogging for me is kind of like a online journal of our lives.

So do I only write happy thoughts? Do I acknowledge the struggles? Do I look back on these hard times and see how far I have come?

The other day I had to take this picture of a Halloween project I did that someone wanted to use and email it to them. Tony commented on how if you look at this picture you see my pretty table with the cute picture frame Bailey and Hannah made for me and the scroll work on the clock. He thought it looked so nice and how if someone looked at it like he did they would think wow look how nice that is.Her house must be like that. But ~ they don't see the rest..the mess I just haven't been able to tackle etc..
When you are looking at other people's blogs you just don't get the whole story just a glossy veneer.

But I am me...and I struggle with the good, bad, and very ugly. My blog won't have a glossy veneer because it's not who I am.
So, I have decided to post this because I think OK ~this is where I am at. So what? So what?
No more worrying whether to blog about it~or not!

A Delightful Escape!

I have been going a little buggy here these past few weeks.Tired of summer and feeling a little blue that we won't get a fabulous fall like we did in Utah and Colorado. It hasn't helped me with the fact that our upstairs AC went out again! Well, Tony (and mom!) talked me into going up to the mountains this weekend! We are staying at the Majestic Inn in Payson. Our bishop had recommended it as a quick escape to the mountains that is not a long way to travel!
When we got here I was so disappointed because when we left Gilbert the temp was 112 and I was expecting it to be a lot cooler here. The temp here was 102. What?? Well fortunately after about an hour the winds picked up and the skies turned grey and a nice rainstorm hit! It was fantastic and a added bonus? It lowered the temps to a bearable 85! Excellent!
We swam and then we went outside to the picnic tables. I loved the smell of the pines and the sound of the wind in the trees! Grace went a little wild picking up every pine cone she could find.
It was heavenly and I feel a little better already!
Tomorrow we are going to head up to Woods Canyon Lake for a little fishing and then we are going to do a little exploring. Should be a fun day all around.
I am glad we decided to escape!

So You Think You Can Dance

We LOVE this show!!! Every week we sit down with the kidlets and watch this show. It is fun to watch Grace and Ethan rock out with the dancers!
One of our favorites was Will and we are still pissed he was voted off. However, my other favorite is Twitch!He rocks! Here is my fav dance he did last week with Katee. Check it out!



So, do you watch So You Think You Can Dance?
Who is your Fav?
Were you shocked/pissed when Will got voted off?
Who do you think is going to win it all? We can't wait to see who does!
Oh, and his solo last night? I heard the song again and forgot how much I loved it so I had to add it to my playlist! It's The Midas Touch! Ahh enjoy the tunes!

52 Blessings Project ~ Week 30

This Week I Am Grateful For ~ My Refrigerator!!

I guess you really don't know how good you have it until it's gone ~ right?

Well, Last week the power went out and when it went back on it blew out the relay on our fridge! We had someone out to fix it about three days later and it was just in time! That was just about all I could stand. I had a smile on my face when a while after he left I heard the ice maker dump new ice cubes into the freezer! Ahhh we were back in business folks!

Everytime I open that darn fridge and feel the cold on my face I think I am so glad I have my fridge!

Having a refrigerator is defiantly a blessing!

A Day Salvaged!

What do you do when you think you are on the verge of killing (or at the very least caging) your screaming , fighting kids? You head to Walmart.(without them of course)
I am a firm believer of retail therapy! I think it could cure just about anything. I am going to have to test that theory a little more though to be sure!
Anyhow, as I wondered aimlessly down the aisles, I found myself quite pleased with myself as I watched other mothers trying to tame their hysterical children. Wow! I felt better already! See I was clever enough to have left them at home! I had avoided the Walmart meltdown and I got to escape for a few hours!
Another added bonus?? I found these cute little hats. A Dora one (grace's fav) and a Mermaid one (Bailey's Fav). They were on clearance for only $1.00!
I brought them home and gave them to the girls and told them they had to be nice~ No more fighting ( I was on the verge of doing something that might have merited a CPS call~ Sheesh!)
Worked like a charm. They played for over an hour with not one fight. In fact they were downright loving to one another! They hopped in the car ( a one seater car and SHARED the seat~Impressive!) They kept saying things like "sweetie where would you like to go shopping today?" "Sweetie should we drive to have some lunch?" It was enough to bring tears to a mother on the edge's eyes! First~ $2.00 hat purchases has brought Harmony into the home again, and second~My girls are already learning the benefits of retail therapy! I guess I am doing something right after all!
Ahhh...I love Walmart!

Wordless Wednsday

Chili Cookoff Texas Style

My friend Corrine had emailed me this story, and my mom had it too. It had me in tears the first time I read it. Its so funny!

Note: If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better. For those of you who have lived in Texas , you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park ...Judge #3 was an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield , IL .'

Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3. Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick. Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild. Judge # 3 -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN 'S AFTERBURNER CHILI Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeño tang! Judge # 2 -- Great BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers. Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA... I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Bar maid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting smashed from all of the beer.

CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing. Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili. Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. woman is starting to look HOT just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive. Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. What do they know?

CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers. Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb. Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers. Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment.**I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably** Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence. Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili? Judge # 3 -- No Report

Things that make me Tick

Lauri and I went to the mountains the other day and it was great to get into the fresh air. When we lived in Colorado and Utah we would just go and drive to explore a new area. Here is a picture of what we love.